I went to Comic Con in Chicago yesterday to hang out with the gang from Crimespree Magazine. If you’ve never been to an event like Comic Con, you’re missing out on an experience. What kind of experience is a little hard to define, but it’s something else.

Though comics may have been the sole focus at one point, now events like Comic Con are home to all sorts of fringe elements. People walk around dressed as Klingons and Superman, the Batmobile and the Delorean from Back to the Future are on display, and there are all sorts of wrestlers who were prominent during my youth selling glossy 8 x 10s. Because I am, on some level, still a mark at heart, I bought an 8 x 10 of Kevin Sullivan and Superstar Billy Graham. I talked with Sullivan for awhile and told him that the angle he ran in Florida in the early 80s probably had quite a bit to do with how I’ve grown up.

Here is a brief transcription of our conversation (seriously):

Me: I just wanted to let you know, back in 1983/1984 when you were in Florida…

Kevin: (eyes narrowing) yeah?

Me: That was a great angle, and…

Kevin: (sigh of relief) Man, I thought you were going to tell me that your mom said I was your dad and you’d done a DNA test.

Me: No, man.

Kevin: Ok, now what was it you wanted to talk about?

Hey, Zombie, I told you I’d wear a Hey Alright shirt the next time I was around somebody famous. Major label execs are probably trying to find your phone number right now.

I hope everybody is doing well.

I love you all.

b.

Let nobody say that Mother Nature does not someday make good on her promises.

Jason called me last week and asked if I wanted to go to the Cubs game because he might have tickets (good tickets) and I said that if he had tickets then I could certainly stand a getaway to Wrigley. I drove down on Friday morning, listening to the new Wovenhand album I’d just picked up (The Threshingfloor),somehow avoiding any real traffic jam and/or construction. Sometimes it’s the simple things in life that make it so worth living.

Anyway, the Cubs suck this year. I figured as much from watching the games on television, but it was all confirmed sitting four rows in back of the team’s dugout during the game. Jason promised and delivered great seats, and though it was a loss (they seem to piling them up lately), it was a relatively quick game, so my suffering was short and swift. I still had lots of time to wonder what it would be like to grab a glove, jump over the rail, and feel the holy dirt and grass beneath my feet. In some alternate universe where I made an equally foolhardy decision to pursue baseball instead of all this word business nonsense, I’m sure I’m batting .197 with thirty errors in the field and a stupid grin plastered on my face. Permanently.

I hope your summer is going well. I know you’re busy getting ready for school to start again, or a birthday, or one last vacation to somewhere not here (wherever “here” is for you). I hope you are happy. In the alternate universe I’ve left tickets for you at the will call window.

b.

Addendum materials–(From Wikipedia) “Wovenhand is a band led by former 16 Horsepower lead singer David Eugene Edwards. Woven Hand’s music combines elements of neofolk, alternative country, post-rock, punk, industrial music, folk rock, old-time music and native American music, among other influences.”

I first heard of 16 Horsepower when I saw Jim White’s unsettling documentary, “Searching for the Wrong-Eyed Jesus.” David Eugene Edwards is playing this really creepy version of Phyllis Ruth while Harry Crews talks about having birds in the house. The clip used to be up on Youtube, but it’s not now, and so I’m presenting the two big things–here is 16 Horsepower live and here is Harry Crews telling stories from “Searching for the Wrong-Eyed Jesus.”

Dig the half-completed story about  Hannity’s Battle of Fire vs. Sleep

So I did, or maybe not, but I recorded the first part of some new thing and made bad music to go behind it using Sony Acid.

Anyway, here it is.  Ninth Continent Installment Number One

I went 4-4, hit for the cycle, and had the best defensive game I’ve had in a long time. I attribute it to my increased gym activity and my focus on eating better, healthier foods.

I tore both of the knees in my pants, road rashed my elbows, dove for things, slid into second, and…I didn’t feel any of it this morning. Just popped right out of bed and started my day like you’re supposed to–pain free and ready to go.

Here is a picture of it.

If you want to see some brief footage from CNN, click here.

If you want to see a bunch of it, click here.

If you want to read about it (and the Morgan Freeman stuff from a few months ago) click here.

But then again it hasn’t really started.

In a season that’s supposed to run ten games, yesterday was supposed to be game #5, but like three other games so far this year, we fell victim to a rain out. At the halfway mark of a ten game season we are 0-1. My statistics for the first half of the year? Well, I’m batting 1.000 (4-4, two singles, a double, and a home run, 3 runs, 2 RBI) and I’ve got a fielding percentage to match (7 put outs, including two double plays). I was all worried that my rapidly aging carcass wasn’t going to be able to produce, but if the small sample size holds true, I’ll probably get a call from the Cubs to play third sometime after the All-Star break (I am a shortstop by birth).

Or maybe I won’t. I guess I’m ok with that. I worry that if I played baseball professionally I’d learn to hate the game. The same logic holds with music–I’m glad that I’m tone deaf and unable to really play an instrument–I love music so damn much and I worry that if I was too inside of it I’d get too critical of it and I’d see holes where there were not holes and I would feel resentment where I should only know admiration. There is as much room on my shelf for Jawbreaker as there is for David Allan Coe as there is for Aceyalone as there is for Joanna Newsome as there is for Owen as there is for Miles Davis. I am constantly amazed by the sheer scope of music and how on any given day I can read somebody’s blog and find a musician or a group I’ve never heard of and by the end of the day wonder how it was I ever lived my life without it being part of the soundtrack.

I used to be worried about cred, but then I realized cred is an internal thing. We are dynamic beings who live through different experiences, who feel different things on different days. Being prisoner to your own gimmick has gotta be hell for the people who suffer through it.

One of those sites is www.rojonekku.com–a blog written by this guy Raven Mack. Before firing up www.rojonekku.com Raven used to produce a ‘zine called The Confederate Mack. It may be that because the random subject matters covered first in the Confederate Mack ‘zine and then later on www.rojonekku.com are things that I’ve got all kinds of worthless knowledge about that I find them so interesting. Educational, even.

Anyway, back in Confederate Mack #48 there’s an article called “Building the Perfect Jukebox: Part A” and there’s a critical examination of some 45s, specifically the quality of the A side vs. the quality of the B side  and bracketing it off in some NCAA 64 type tournament (including this from Raven: “Here’s what came out in the final eight the first time doing this stupid shit, with me listing the songs with what’s gonna go as the A-side in the jukebox even though usually it’s the real-life 45 B-side, since record companies don’t know shit about loungin.’”)

Well, sometime on Saturday I was reading the article and I got to the point where he was talking about the 45 from Archie Bell and the Drells “There’s Gonna be a Showdown”/”Go For What You Know” and when I was reading it I thought it was the best and funniest thing I’d read in a long time and then I read it out loud and then I was like, “I should record myself reading this, because that’d be funny,” and then I did record it and put a beat to it and if you click on the link below you can hear it.

*note* One of Raven’s more recent discussions was about the legendary DJ Screw from Houston, Texas. In tribute, I remixed the piece I made to fit into the larger theme.

Readings from the Confederate Mack #48 (Screwed)

If you have time, you should go over to www.rojonekku.com and browse a bit. Some of you will wonder what in the hell I’m going on about. Others of you will understand. For those of you who understand, you should click on the “enable rojonekku” button and throw some scratch Raven’s way and he’ll probably send you some of the old Confederate Mack ‘zines. Sooner or later he’ll have a book out and you’ll be able to put those old ‘zines up on Ebay and pay for somebody’s college tuition.